Working Exclusively With Women- Why I Made The Shift
Last year I decided to take a big leap and shift my practice to focusing ONLY on women. After fifteen years in practice as a massage therapist, working with all different types of people and demographics, I knew that it was time to niche down and specialize in an area I was passionate about. Many of my male clients were confused and upset, and wondered why I had made that decision.
One of the main factors in deciding to work with women is just the fact that I AM a woman, and I know women’s struggles. I know what kinds of trauma women go through, what we endure and carry. I know the pain of domestic violence, sexual abuse, rape, abortion, and childbirth. I know about heartache, being cheated on and dealing with narcissistic abuse. I understand the uniquely feminine struggles of shame, body image, weight and self esteem issues. I know about body dysmorphia, eating disorders, menstrual issues and hormonal imbalances, pelvic disorders, sexual issues and battles that only women face.
Yes, I understand that many men face similar issues in their own ways as well, but sometimes women need another woman who understands and has experienced the female perspective. No matter how conscious, empathetic or compassionate a man may be, he will NEVER understand what it is like to be a woman.
Another reason I work with women is because I work with energy. I harness tantric healing energy in my practice, and this often feels like sexual energy, because in a way, it is.
The divine feminine Goddess energy has a sexual nature to it. It transforms and transmutes negative energy and releases blockages. Many of us have blockages in our sexual and sacral chakras. This is because of the sexual repression we all experience from patriarchal, puritanical and social pressure to conform. Sexual energy is life force energy, but because we’ve been so disconnected from it and shamed for embodying it, it has become dysfunctional and shut down. This often leads to harmful ways of expressing that energy, like cheating, pornography, bursts of anger or rage, etc.
Over the years, as I got stronger and more experienced with energy work, my healing abilities grew, and so did my sexual energy. I began to embody more of the goddess and divine feminine, embracing this and working with that energy to help my clients. But men often found this energy to be sexual, rather than therapuetic. It often made me very uncomfortable, because I knew that many of the men that came to me needed sexual healing, but I couldn’t help them in the way they wanted. They wanted release, not transmutation, and of course it didn’t feel right to me as I was a professional and had to maintain those professional boundaries.
I then felt forced to go against my intuition and shut down my abilities- forcing myself to perform in the traditional Western way- which is to focus only on the physical body and ignore the mental, emotional and spiritual bodies. I was making myself do less quality work and not be true to myself or who I was. In essence, I was dishonoring myself by not allowing my true healing abilities to shine through.
Something told me that even though I had helped many men in the past, it was time for me to start focusing on a population I could really help. I knew that I was being called to work with women who had dealt with the same types of struggles I had gone through. I wanted to help women who had shut down their sexual energy or had it taken from them by being abused. I wanted to help women heal childhood trauma and dysfunctional patterns of abuse. I wanted to help women who were ready to embrace their spiritual path, own their own sacred divine feminine energy, and transform themselves from victims to warriors.
I finally made the difficult decision to release all of the men who I had worked with, some of them my loyal clients for many years. It was hard, and scary, as I wasn’t sure if I would be able to grow my business back to where I wanted it to be to support myself. However, when we honor our true selves and follow our true calling, Spirit makes a way. When I was able to release those clients with love, it created a loving space for all the women who really needed my healing energy and gifts to come forth.
I am so happy and grateful to be working and helping the people who need it the most! I love working with women, and being able to use all of my gifts to heal and support them. In doing this, I get to be my true self, without stifling or hiding any of the energy I bring to the table!